Moves Like Jagger
by chartreuseian
Summary: He may not have the moves like Jagger but Nikola Tesla could get the girl regardless.


***sigh* I shouldn't be allowed near my laptop after 10pm. This is the kind of crazy, stupid, ridonkulous stuff that results. I had been working on another fic but then... well, the muse moves in mysterious ways...**

**Inspired by "Move Like Jagger" (duh) and the fact that Nikola is back in tomorrow nights episode and, I figured if I was going to start a slightly more humorous fic of significant length, I had better write something mildly humorous in the hopes that I can get my mojo back. **

**Also, set sometime when Nikola has been devamped... Because let's face it, drunk Nikola and Helen are too tempting. OoC, I know... Sorry 'bout that...**

**Anyway, I don't own it which makes me peeved.**

**xx**

* * *

><p>When Henry had suggested a New Years Eve party, this had not been the outcome he'd expected. Sure he'd expected drunkenness, giggles and inappropriate behaviour but never had he expected drunkenness, giggles and inappropriate behaviour from Nikola Tesla. Combined, the six of them had consumed just under 9 bottles of wine but no one was faring as badly as Tesla. Perhaps after spending so long in perpetual sobriety he'd forgotten what a few too many glasses of that vintage he'd professed a love for could do to his self control.<p>

"Who knew the vamp could dance?" Kate whispered with a giggle. The two of them were lounging on the floor, back against the wall as they waited for the clock to finally strike midnight. They'd all been steadily drinking since 5pm and, Henry was just beginning to regret starting the party so early. He was tired and lethargic and so ready for bed that he felt like an old man.

"Ex-vamp," Will corrected from where he was sprawled in front of the fire place.

"Ex-vamp," Kate agreed, holding up her mostly empty glass in a toast. "But, either way he's got moves," she said, waggling her eyebrows on the last word before dissolving into another fit of giggles as the aforementioned ex-vamp twirled unsteadily to the last beats of the song.

"What happened to the song?" he asked, slurring his words only slightly.

"Songs end Nikola," Helen reminded him from where she was elegantly perched on the edge of her couch. He pouted at her before heading over towards the discreet stereo set up in the corner of her office. After much badgering, Helen had agreed to allow them to use her office. After all, there were only six of them and airing out one of the entertainment rooms seemed a bit silly.

"This is a boring party," Biggie grunted from his place next to Will. Nikola had already made the obligatory walking carpet on the carpet next to the professional doormat joke over an hour ago and, while both Biggie and Will had tried to be incensed at the insult, after a few too many swigs of the Big Guy's moonshine, neither had paid him much attention.

"We probably shouldn't have started drinking at midday," Kate allowed with a hiccup.

"It so was not midday," Will objected, raising the hand still clutching his glass up high in the air to emphasise his point.

"Was too."

"Was not."

"Was too."

"Was not."

"Was too!"

"Was-."

"Was not," Henry interjected with a sigh.

"Well, it feels like it," Kate grumbled before letting her eyes drift shut.

Meanwhile, Nikola had finally made his way to the stereo but seemed to be having about as much luck with it as the others were having with staying awake.

"Why won't the stupid machine work!" he exclaimed, pressing a few random buttons before letting out an angry huff.

"I wasn't aware the machine had any measureable intelligence," Helen commented smoothly as she took another sip of wine.

"How are you still so sober?" Will asked incredulously, rolling his head so that he could look up at her.

" 's the source blood," Kate slurred sleepily before turning and nuzzling into Henry who obligingly held his arms open for her.

Helen merely chuckled, taking another sip as, finally, Nikola managed to get the music to begin again.

"HA! I win!" he cried triumphantly, spinning around with a goofy smile on his face. Picking up on the beat of the song, he began to bounce awkwardly, closing his eyes as he began to sway, waving his arms around as he sauntered back towards the corner in which he'd left his glass of wine.

_Just shoot for the stars  
>If it feels right<br>And aim for my heart  
>If you feel like<br>And take me away and make it OK  
>I swear I'll behave<br>_  
>"I like this song," Kate muttered, letting out a tiny snort of laughter as she caught a glimpse of Nikola's impromptu dance.<p>

"Me too," the Big Guy grunted before chuckling darkly.

The bass line picked up and Nikola's movements became a little more forceful.

_You wanted control  
>So we waited<br>_  
>"You know Nikola, I never expected you to be interested in pop music although this particular song does seem quite fitting," Helen said, setting down her glass of wine and leaning back so she could observe her old friend as he bopped along to the music.<p>

_I put on a show  
>Now I make it<br>_  
>"Why?" he asked loudly, not opening his eyes as he spun on the ball of his foot, throwing his arms out in a flourish.<p>

_You say I'm a kid  
>My ego is big<br>I don't give a shit_

"Why I thought you'd lack interest or why is this one fitting?" she said, cocking her head, a bemused smile playing on her lips as she wondered if it was the alcohol or if he really was that thick._  
><em>  
><em>And it goes like this<em>

"Hmmm... both?" he decided with a blind grin in her general direction.

_Take me by the tongue  
>And I'll know you<br>Kiss me 'til you're drunk  
>And I'll show you<em>

"I'm sure you'll figure both those things out in the morning. So long as the hangover isn't too bad," she replied with an indulgent laugh. 

_All the moves like Jagger_  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger<em>  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger<em>

He said nothing, simply wiggling his hips in time to the music, hands thrown up high above his head.

_I don't need to try to control you_  
><em>Look into my eyes and I'll own you<em>

"Come dance with me Helen," he called, opening his eyes as that delightfully goofy grin appeared on his face once more. 

_With the moves like Jagger_  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger<em>  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger<em>

"If you can even call that dancing," Will put in with a goofy grin of his own, obviously pleased with his 'insult'.

_Baby it's hard  
>When you feel like you're broken and scarred<br>Nothing feels right  
>But when you're with me<br>I make you believe  
>That I've got the key<em>

"Please Helen," Nikola whined as he once again begun bouncing.

_(Oh!) So get in the car_  
><em>We can ride it<em>

Helen waited for the jab about riding him but it never came. The alcohol was _definitely_ affecting his brain, she decided.

_Wherever you want  
>Get inside it<br>And you want to steer  
>But I'm shifting gears<br>I'll take it from here  
>And it goes like this<em>

"Pretty please," he wheedled, moving towards her. When she laughed at him once more he pouted and spun away, dancing back to his corner. 

_Take me by the tongue_  
><em>And I'll know you<em>  
><em>Kiss me 'til you're drunk<em>  
><em>And I'll show you<em>

He as so absorbed in his dance that he didn't hear her less than stealthy approach (because although she could look sober, she knew and he knew she was anything but) until her hand came to land on his shoulder. Nikola spun around immediately, wrapping his arms her waist and pulling her closer, moving against her in time with the music. 

_I don't need to try to control you_  
><em>Look into my eyes and I'll own you<em>

His eyes fluttered closed again but, as he pulled her impossibly closer, a tiny smile grew on his lips.

_With the moves like Jagger_  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger (Yeah)<em>  
><em>I've got the moves like Jagger<em>

One of his hands began to slide up and down her back, teasing until he found the back of her skirt. Hooking a finger under the waistband, his other hand moved around to cup her ass tentatively, as if afraid she'd pull away.

_You want to know how to make me smile_

A small smile grew on Helen's lips...  
><em><br>Take control, own me just for the night_

_... _as she leaned into his embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck.  
><em><br>But if I share my secret_

She let out a contented hum, moving further into his arms so that her lips brushed against his..._  
>You're gonna have to keep it<em>

... earlobe as her body moved against his in time with the music, making her aware of every plane of his body.  
><em><br>Nobody else can see this_

She closed her eyes and let go, following the music and...

_So watch and learn_

... completely forgot about the fact that there were four other people in the room.  
><em><br>I won't show you twice_

His hands were getting more adventurous and, deciding it was time to get a little thrill of her own...  
><em><br>Head to toe, oh baby, rub me right_

... Helen made sure that as much of her body as possible was pressed up against his as they moved.  
><em><br>But if I share my secret_

Biting her lip, she ran a hand into his hair...  
><em><br>You're gonna have to keep it_

... grinding against him in a way that she'd never done with anyone else.  
><em><br>Nobody else can see this_

"Looks like the vamp's not the only one with moves," Kate whispered, startling Henry who had been watching the pair with a mixture of absolute disgust and awe.

_And it goes like this_

"Do you think we should leave?" he asked groggily, looking down at the woman who was wrapped around him.

"Nope," she said, eyes closed as she tightened her grip on him.

_Take me by the tongue_

The clock began to chime.  
><em><br>And I'll know you_

"It's midnight," Helen whispered before spinning around in his arms...  
><em><br>Kiss me 'til you're drunk_

... unsurprised to feel his lips land on her neck. More like kiss me _when _I'm drunk, she mused.  
><em><br>And I'll show you_

"Happy New Year," she whispered with a sigh, letting herself grind back against him.

_All the moves like Jagger_

"Kiss," he demanded against her neck.  
><em><br>I've got the moves like Jagger_

"Kiss," he said again, tightening his grip in the hopes of making her move.  
><em><br>I've got the moves like Jagger_

She spun around before he had a chance to process her actions.

"Ki-," he began to demand.

_I don't need to try to control you_

His redundant words turned into a groan against her lips as she kissed him hungrily. Their lower bodies stopped grinding as they focused their attentions on their fused lips. His hands grabbed at her, pushing at her until she allowed him to be flush against her. Her tongue, fuelled by the tiniest taste of him began to explore his mouth, urging his own into exploration too.

_Look into my eyes and I'll own you_

"Happy New Year," Henry whispered to Kate.  
><em><br>With the moves like Jagger_

"Happy New Year," she mumbled back before yawning.  
><em><br>I've got the moves like Jagger_

"Happy New Year," Biggie grunted, prodding an unconscious Will with a gleeful chuckle.

_I've got the moves like Jagger_

He may not have the moves like Jagger but Nikola Tesla could get the girl regardless.


End file.
